Today my mother said these words to me: “withholding love is never the answer. Why would someone want to withhold love?”
It is a good question, isn’t it? Why WOULD someone want to withhold love? It is often used as a form of punishment. If someone does something you don’t agree with or something that is hurtful, you stop loving them or stop displaying your love for them temporarily. You punish them to teach a lesson. The lesson carries a message and the message is: if you do (blank) I won’t love you anymore.
Why is that a lesson we would want to teach someone we claim to love? In a recent statement made by the Dalai Lama, he said: “All major world religious traditions carry the same message: the message of love, compassion, forgiveness, tolerance, contentment”. If that is true, which I believe it to be, then withholding love should never be an option. It isn’t our job to teach each others a lesson by refusing them our love. Our only job is to generously give all the love we have to give, even when it feels impossible.
I am trying to teach myself to love unconditionally. As of yet, I’m not very good at it. I’ve come across some inspiring quotes in my quest to learn how to love unconditionally, I have included them below.
Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend. – Martin Luther King, Jr.
Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.- Wayne Dyer
Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you. -Luke 6: 27-31
I’ve learned that love, not time, heals all wounds. -Andy Rooney